My sister sent me this in an email. I've read it before on a Japanese website like a year ago, but I'll post this here anyways, bolding the things that apply to me. This is somewhat stereotypical, but anyhow, here goes.
You're obsessed with your hair, your car, and your clothes
You want to marry a Korean American or Chinese American
woman (males); or you want to marry a white guy (females).
You know that Camp doesn't mean a cabin in the woods.
Your Issei grandparents had an arranged marriage.
One of your relatives was a "picture bride."
You have relatives who live in Hawaii. I will soon :)
You belong to a Japanese credit union
Wherever you live now, you always come home to the Obon
The bushes in your front yard are trimmed into balls.
You have a kaki tree in the backyard.
You have at least one bag of sembei in the house at all
times. Oh heck yes.
You have a Japanese doll in a glass case in your living
room. actually in my bedroom
You have a nekko cat in your house for good luck.
You have large Japanese platters in your china cabinet. - I can't carry many fragil things, my nomadic life doesn't permit it (movers can break anything)
You have the family mon and Japanese needlepoint on the
You own a multicolored lime green polyester patchwork quilt. I think we do?
Your grandma used to crochet all your blankets, potholders
You check to see if you need to take off your shoes at your
When you visit other Japanese, you give or receive a bag of
fruits or vegetables.
When you visit other Japanese, you know that you should
When you leave a Japanese person's house, you take leftover
food home on a paper plate or a Styrofoam meat tray. same thing with a lot of my filipino friends too :D
You keep a supply of rubber bands, twist ties, butter and
tofu containers in the kitchen.
You know that Pat Morita doesn't really speak like Mr.
You're mad because Kristi Yamaguchi should have gotten more
commercial endorsements than Nancy Kerrigan. well not mad but..
When your back is sore, you use Tiger Balm or that
flexi-stick with the rubber ball on the end that goes,
After funerals, you go for Chinameshi.
After giving koden, you get stamps in the mail.
You fight fiercely for the check after dinner.
You've hidden money in the pocket of the person who paid for
You don't need to read the instructions on the proper use of
You eat soba on New Year's Eve. Udon! *shaka*
You start off the new year with a bowl of ozoni for good
luck and the mochi sticks to the roof of your mouth.
You pack bento for road trips. something like that
Your grandma made the best sushi in town.
You cut all your carrots and hot dogs at an angle.
You know the virtues of SPAM.
You know what it means to eat "footballs."
You grew up eating ambrosia, wontons and finger Jell-O at
You always use Best Foods mayonnaise and like to mix it with
shoyu to dip broccoli. --how sick is that! YUCK!
You use the "finger method" to measure the water for your
rice cooker. no need in the rice cooker, but using a regular pot, yes
You grew up on rice: bacon fried rice, chili rice, curry
rice or red rice. Nishiki is teh rule.
You like to eat rice with your spaghetti.
You can't start eating until you have a bowl of rice.
Along with salt and pepper, you have a shoyu dispenser at
You buy rice 25 pounds at a time and shoyu a gallon at a
time. Indeed, all the time.
Natto: you either love it or hate it.
As a kid, you used to eat Botan rice candy. and I still do.
You have a pet named Chibi or Shiro. had a pet mouse named chibi
Someone you know, owns an Akita or Shiba dog.
At school, you had those Hello Kitty pencil boxes and sweet
Milk makes you queasy and alcohol turns your face red.
Your dad owns a Member's Only jacket.
Someone you know drives an Acura Integra, Honda Accord or
Toyota Camry. --not sure about that one
You used to own one of those miniature zori keychains still do.
You have a kaeru frog or good luck charm hanging in your
Your parents compare you to their friends' kids.
Your dentist, doctor and optometrist is Japanese American. the one back in hawaii was
Whenever you're with more than three people, it takes an
hour to decide where to eat.
You've heard your name pronounced a half-dozen different
You know that E.O. 9066 isn't a zip code.
In the bathroom you have a crocheted toilet paper cover.
You know the California Hotel is not located in California.
No matter how bad your Japanese is, you still know the words
shi-shi and un-chi. tee hehehehehe
You have, at one time or another, helped fold 1,000 cranes
for someone's wedding, anniversary, or someone in the hospital.
When you meet another JA, you can be sure you're either
related to them or know someone who knows them.
You have one of those "always hot" rice cookers in your
You were told to eat nori so your hair would be black.
You say "itadakimasu" before you eat.
You know to stop yelling when you hear the word
"yakamashii." more like "urusai"
You compliment a person from Japan on how well they speak
English, and they compliment you on how well you speak
Japanese, and you both know you're kind of stretching
You know you don't need a spoon for miso soup.
The ultimate Chinese dinner for you includes: seaweed soup,
chicken chow mein, chashu, pakkai, shrimp with lobster
sauce, almond duck, pea chow yuk and homyu.
You know that summer means it's time for somen and shaved
ice with azuki beans.
Your dad's front lawn is his pride and joy - to the point of
obsession. --my dad is not Japanese
You're proud to be Japanese
- and you pass these jokes on to
all your Japanese friends!